Americans Worried Trump Could Make America Too Great

Pres. Donald Trump pumps a tiny fist while imagining how great he'll make America pretty soon, any day now, really.

(Lynchburg, Tenn.) Residents of a tiny town in the middle of the greatest country on Earth expressed worry today that President Donald Trump will be so effective he could make America too great.

"He's so fuckin' kick-ass," Jasper Hollingsworth said while placing a large pinch of tobacco in his mouth then making love to his cousin. "He could make us so fuckin' great, that we're just too fuckin' great, you know what I mean, baby?" he asked while thrusting his penis back and forth inside his cousin Vanessa from nearby Hicksburg.

"I sure do," she replied. "Now gimme some of that Skoal! And dick!" 

Elsewhere Trump voters expressed similar worry. "I hope he doesn't make us TOO great," Tonya Edmo said while plugging quarters into the MegaTouch machine at the local laundry. "I mean, it COULD happen. Trump's so amazing, he could make us so great, that probably the world explodes, or some shit, you know. Like one of them particle escalators, you know, where they escalate a atom til you make a black hole."

"Yeah, but in Trump's case, he'd make a WHITE hole! Cuz, you know...the fucking blacks and shit!" her cousin and boyfriend Todd Joe Chigget laughed. "He'd make a white hole and send all those blacks back across the Rio Grande to Africa!" he added, kissing Tonya long and hard on the mouth and grabbing her tittie with his claw.

Trump was elected the 45th and final president of the United States in November.